What I'm feeling Right Now

               No one can foresee our future, right? So do I. There are a lot of questions that I may ask. But to whom? God? Perhaps. I’m not sure though. I’m gonna tell what I concerned about. You know, guys I think I’m not belongs to English Major. Although, at the first time I felt so blessed because I can be part of UGM. University of Gadjah Mada, one of the best univ in this country. My parents also agreed about it. That’s why they want me so bad to study in UGM. I know I know, it’s not a bad one, but this is must. I’m going to mad at that time. I was thinking if I’m not gonna make it, I mean be part of UGM. What  happens to me next? Sometimes, I felt that my parents always push me over. Okey, Im not like my sisters. Maybe they more clever than me. So what? we’re different right? Okey, forget it, let’s go back to the topic.

               I never imagined that I will be studied in English major. Yeah, this is one of my favorite course when I was in high school but I mean I don’t wanna learn further more about English. I have another “dream” about where place that I work in. Be honest guys. First things that come up in your mind about English is teacher. Is it true? That’s so boring, right? I have been studying English in Vocational College for a year. At the first time, I’m a bit nervous especially when speaking. This is the worst among the others. I’m not used to speak too much in high school. Furthermore, I have to do a mini drama in class.

               Ahh I hate it. I feel weird standing in front of a lot of people although that’s my friend. Let me tell you a secret. Maybe this is not good but I have to tell ya. I felt that in my class there are some people who hated me. When I’m do a presentation, they tried to put me down. I don’t why but I could see it in theirs eyes, they way they see me. Not only me who felt it. I tried to ignore it as my friend’s advice. It worked, but those things also made me wanna try SBMPTN again. This is such a dilemma. I feel English is not belongs to me, but in other side, I started comfort with the friends *except the people who I’ve told you before*. However, I have to decide. I decided to try again. I don’t have any preparation for it, only depends on past memories that still left. I still waiting for the announcement. 28 June and 1 July will be the day. Whether I passed the test or not? I hope I will. If I’m not, I will go back to my Major right now.